Well, the time has come to say something that has me dealing with a bit of “mixed emotions”.
You see, I’ve decided for several reasons that the relationship between Facebook & me is a bit dysfuntional on many levels. So, I’ve decided it was best that we spend some time apart so we can both “find ourselves” 🙂 But at the SAME time I’m excited because during this “time apart” I’m devoting more time to working in “the lab” to get some MAJOR projects done that I have in the works.
Oh I know this seems like some marketing ploy or being overly dramatic, but I’m 100 percent serious!
Here is the deal,
Look, I’ve been online since before there was a “modern internet” … REALLY! Back in the Commodore 64 / 300 Baud Modem days communicating on message boards and usenet (look it up 🙂 So I’m no stranger to how technology can change the way we communicate and interact.
But lately … I’ve become very “disturbed” at what Social Media (particularly Facebook) has done to people’s lives, families, and their businesses – mine included.
Let me explain, stick with me.
For years, personal development courses have been the staple of my life. You name it … audiobooks, books, tapes, courses, seminars on personal growth … I’ve done them all. But my favorite of all has to be the “Ask & It Is Given” series of books / training by Jerry & Esther Hicks. Basically it’s where the whole “Law Of Attraction” concept got it’s start. You should check it out.
Now the core philosophy of this training is that in order to “attract” the things you want, you need to concentrate on that and not the things you don’t want … and that you can’t let negative emotions impede the flow of “receiving” of the things you desire.
Feelings like anger, helplessness, rage, boredom … and envy … are things that take out “out of alignment” to getting in the path to keep attracting what you want.
AND UNFORTUNATELY it’s been a documented fact that Facebook has been a HUGE cause of NEGATIVE emotion for so many people! Don’t believe me just check out this one article:
Seriously, as someone who is very VERY aware of how emotions can affect your life (and I’m pretty immune to those issues) … I was shocked when I realized just how much Facebook was HINDERING my business!
Facebook has gone from a place for family and friends to connect and share information, stories, pictures and events … into a form of Social Voyerism & Exhibitionism that is creating major personal issues for those involved.
At it’s worst I have personally seen a seemingly simple “connection” between lost friends on Facebook turn into a true “fatal attraction” where families and lives were literally destroyed due to a form of “facebook psychosis and paranoia” occured. Where normally happy people begain to have their attitudes, feelings and thoughts “turned” by the Social Media circus. At it’s least, I just get pissed off at someone online for their opinion.
My ephiphany came about a week ago.
I was doing my MORE THAN ONCE DAILY scroll through my news feed and the following happened:
* I saw yet ANOTHER duckfaced, self important selfie – it pissed me off!
* I saw yet another marketer friend of mine post a check – it made me envious!
* I saw yet ANOTHER post where someone was holy than thou about their food regemen – pissed me off again!
* I saw someone posted a horrible picture of an abused animal – made me sad!
* I saw someone post an idiotic response to a political situation – made me think they were stupid!
* I saw someone bragging about their new weight loss – I rolled my eyes thinking “you think you’re so much better than everyone else”
By about 5 minutes in of this, I realized that my mental state was NOT where it was when I started.
I woke up, did my affirmations, did my meditation and felt SO energized. BUT after 5 minutes of going through facebook, I was VERY VERY far away from that good feeling state. And the further you are away from that state the further away you are from being at the center of your point of attraction. I called this Facebook Aggravation Syndrome.
SERIOUSLY – I’m probably the LEAST “envious” person I know. I applaud when others do well, I applaud the success of others, I celebrate the abundance that flows to others – because there is more than enough abundance for us all.
BUT I CAN TELL YOU that as I carefully monitored in my journal how I felt as I was going through posts and what “thoughts” were going through my head and where my emotional state ended up after going through facebook, I can tell you … that almost 100 percent of the time it was a worse state.
I was mad
I was envious
I was frustrated
I felt bad about what I did
I felt bad about what I didn’t do
I just was not in a place of positive vibration.
I can’t tell you how many times I have had HUGELY successful people tell me that they don’t EVEN LOOK AT THE NEWS! WHY? Because they say that it does nothing but breed fear, doubt and bad emotions and can “derail” your positive path for success.
Well … I now put Facebook into that category. BUT it’s much worse. You not only get news on facebook but you get other people venting, bitching, complaining, worrying … and this combined “hive mind” mentality just creates a huge mass of NEGATIVITY that does NO ONE ANY GOOD. It’s “misery loves company” on steriods.
SO I decided to take a few days on and few days off Facebook. AND I can tell you that after a few days off, I was more productive, happy and on my path. The days I spent on facebook were days where my life kind of derailed and … dammit … I realized how much TIME I wasted on there that I could have been doing something to bring into my life the things I wanted, instead of being an “envious voyeur” on facebook!
SO here is the deal.
* I have defriended a TON of people. These were people that when I looked at their posts – if they did not bring light and happiness in my life or really made me feel bad. They were gone.
* I have put people into lists. Business associates in one and CLOSE FAMILY AND REAL LIFE FRIENDS in another and I make it where I would only see them. And even then if some of them were “negative” I would block them on my feed.
* I have blocked feeds (as said above)
* I have limited my exposure to facebook from daily to every couple of days to now, I’m going cold turkey for a while.
*YES I will use Faceook Chat on my iphone to communicate with a few family & friends that use that but I’m DELETING my facebook app on my phone 🙂
SO I’m going into this experiment for the next 45 days to see how things go. How much more productive I can be and will be tracking my results. SO this “hiatus” is not to be taken personally by anyone … on the contrary … it’s the facebook system itself that helps create this environment. And if you chance the environment you chance the person.
AS A SIDE EFFECT OF THIS DISCOVERY I have also done some other things in my business life that are going to make some people very mad …
I have decided to also consolidate my core business concepts into the handful of things that I do well and make things happen, and am DROPPING things that I have been testing, trying and considering.
In other words, I believe in multilple streams of income, but consolidating those streams into a very very small group of core income streams.
Some of my affiliate relationships – done
Some of my network marketing consultations and positions – done
Some of my business relationships – done
The fact that I sat down and wrote down what was taking me closer to my goals and what was taking me further away was invigorating.
So … as a courtesy, please don’t write me on facebook about getting in another deal. WHY? For one I won’t see it since I won’t be on facebook. And 2 … I’m done with many deals right now. I have three core things in my mix and going to work them hard like I have done in the past where I have had great success.
AND AS A CLOSING THOUGHT
If you are reading this and … if you were either made envious, mad or frustrated at what I posted on facebook in the past. I’m truly sorry. I mean, I fell into this dogma myself. Overshare your success and attract people. Naaa … I know for a fact I probably pissed off more than I attracted, and for that I do apologize
As Brian Tracey said:
“The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire not things we fear.”
Facebook caused me to lose focus …
Concentrating on not pissing people off in too many “multiple business situations” caused me to lose focus …
And without focus you can’t succeed. So It’s time to focus!
Stay tuned … maybe I will see you on facebook in the near future (or if I have a relapse) 🙂
Now let’s GO GO GO!
Filed under: Editorial
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